November '09

I have to say, it's really difficult to write a post every single day. I was going to try to get through last year by doing a rough summary of a month every day. Sheesh. November was dreadful. It started out great. We went to Arizona to see Eric graduate from the University of Phoenix. After that, we went to the Grand Canyon to fulfill an item on our "Bucket List". However, while we were there, we got word that my young brother, Jeff, had died suddenly in Texas. What terrible news! When I look at our pictures from the Grand Canyon, I just remember how lonely and lost I felt that Jeff had died. It's strange that I should have felt lonely, as I was surrounded by people, but a real niche in my life--the one my brother had filled--was empty. I still miss him, and I'm sure I always will. I remember his asthma-filled nights when he was little and we lived in San Diego. I was so afraid he would die--he was very sick with it. After he stopped having attacks, I just always assumed he would outlive me--he was 10 years younger, after all. I didn't even see him that often, but I knew he was there, and he might call me, or I might call him and we would renew that connection easily. It's a big loss, and not only for me, but for the whole family, too. Thanksgiving was OK. I made dinner; Mark and Calysta came over, as did Bobby's son Ricky and also Destiny. Her family had gone to the other grandparents' home, but she stayed home and came to our house. Mark helped prepare our dinner, and I enjoyed that. Altogether it was a good day... ...but a pretty dreadful month.